Eight Months.

I don't think it's a surprise to people that the past week has been difficult. I have heard over and over again that grief comes in waves. Well, if that is the case, then the past week has felt like having my head plunged back below the surface. Milestones are hard. Today, my head is feeling … Continue reading Eight Months.

The Worst Kind of Math.

It's a relatively little known fact that this youth ministry professional spent enough time in undergrad as a math education major that I finished undergrad with a major in religious studies and minors in both recreational ministry and mathematics. That's right: a religious studies major with a mathematics minor. It seems almost contradictory. Like one doesn't belong with … Continue reading The Worst Kind of Math.

The Shirt. 

There are a lot of things in my house and in my life that have stories to tell. I hold onto things. I keep them around as reminders. I have post-it notes with encouraging things written on them all over my desk at work. I have scraps of string and yarn from retreats and conferences. … Continue reading The Shirt. 

Thirty Four.

Thirty four Tuesdays. Thirty four Wednesdays. Thirty four Thursdays. This week is the thirty fourth week since we found out that Alexander's heart was no longer beating. The thirty fourth week since we spent days in the hospital waiting for him to be born. The thirty fourth week since we held that sweet boy in our … Continue reading Thirty Four.

This is Tuesday.

The day we found out Alexander's heart wasn't beating--the day we received the most devastating news of our entire lives--was a Tuesday. In many ways, my life since then has been measured in Tuesdays. For weeks, and even months, after we lost Alexander, Tuesdays were difficult. The most difficult. Every Tuesday felt like I was reliving … Continue reading This is Tuesday.

There Are No Easy Answers.

True confession: I used to be an easy answer person. I used to think that I could handle things on my own. I used to believe things like "God won't give you more than you can handle." I used to think that life's most difficult questions had simple answers. "Well, we live in a broken world." "It must be … Continue reading There Are No Easy Answers.

Seven Months.

Seven months is a long time. A lot can happen in seven months. In seven months, the seasons have changed twice. From summer to fall, and from fall to winter. In seven months, we have seen epic finishes to professional sports seasons, including a seven game World Series between two drought teams, and the first … Continue reading Seven Months.